Rules of Mom

I am a parenting magazine junkie. Just wanted to get that out there. I have subscriptions to: Parenting, Parents, Family Fun, Women's Day, Good Housekeeping and Family Circle. I get free from work: Wonder Time, Child and Cookie. I read them all. I can't get enough. So anyway, Wonder Time has turned out to be one of my favorite magazines because the articles are so clever and cute and funny. They aren't the usual articles. I tend to even save a lot of the articles because they are so well written. For example, the article about a Dad's obsession for Star Wars and his excitement when he found out he was having a boy and now he could pass on this legacy. I'll let you read it sometime, I laughed so hard I almost peed a little. It made me think of my brother who just trekked to Minneapolis with his brood of 4 kids to see some Star Wars exhibit at some museum. (snicker) Anyway, to the point, which has nothing to do with Weight Watchers. But it is cute. Today I read an article entitled "Them's the Rules". It was all about rules Moms make up. Here are some of my favorites:

1. Whoever made it gets to flush it.
2. Whichever child (or adult) is being the "stinker" of the week is on pooper-scooper duty.
3. Whever out and about, a child can touch anything but only with one finger. If they break this rule, they have to spend the rest of the time out and about with their hands on top of their head.
4. You can run around naked only in your room.
5. No steamrolling the cat.
6. If Mom or Dad has said no to something and y ou whine, the answer will still be no. But if you hold the back of your hand to your forehead (in your best impersonation of a damsel in distress) and say, "Alas, I fear I shall perish without it!" the answer might (just might) be changed to a yes.
7. There are no bad words, just bad places to use those words. For example, the f-word and the s-word are onlyl appropriate in rock music, so you can't use them until your a certified rock star.
8. If you want to watch an inappropriate move, such as the movie "300", it isn't forbidden because you may be scared, it is forbidden because you won't understand it. So you can see the movie "300" as soon as you write a three page paper on the Battle of Thermopylae.

And in our house the number one rule is:

Hugs, not hits! (specifically aimed toward Gabe of course)

So what are your rules?

Mols